FAMILY INSTITUTION - maxim sound, strong and beautiful, for those that dream in constituting a beautiful family. However, marriage is not still a failed institution. The failure of the marriage impedes, sometimes, of the representatives, except for larger force. The famous infidelities and betrayal, in the current days, they are the largest responsible for the destruction of the relationships. 

In some countries, the betrayal and the infidelity are still treated with rigidity for the Law. In Brazil, from the promulgation of the penal code of 1940, the adultery was typified as crime. He/she/you carted, besides, the right to the betrayed husband of killing so much the wife as it lover-was it to famous " self-defense of the honor ". Almost everything was allowed to take revenge on behalf of the wound it honors, mainly when it was dealt with passionate matters. It is pointed out that that " culture " draconian juridical discriminatory gave breaches so that the husbands, engaged couple or lovers made justice with the own hands, under the allegation of the already mentioned " self-defense of the honor ". But the impression that had was been that the man had just honors. Actually, so much the woman as the man is subject to the suffering due to the betrayal or infidelity. The subject is that, in rare cases, the woman acts with violence when discovering a betrayal. It is oh that the violence for itself frustrated the victory conquered by the feminist movement of that time, being like this, it creates her returned her against the creator and, with that, he/she came to become a legislation discriminatory that was perpetuated by several decades. 

It is not necessary to be juristic to deduce that our penal right is still very on this side of the current reality and, time or other, it ends up collaborating direct or indirectly with some judicial decisions that, in my opinion, they are running into the evolution of the human rights and the own Federal Constitution of l988, that it consecrated the equality among all the citizens. After all, live the democracy. 

To marry and to constitute family is right inviolable of all of us. They are right that occurs of our democratic freedom. There is who says that marriage is a form of interrupting the sexual freedom. Yes, when being fiancé or when getting married, in thesis, it is taken an oath fidelity to the dear person that is going a lot besides the simple loving fidelity. From the time of Moses, an engagement was considered a marriage, tends the same responsibility before God. Having betrayal, a per-nuptial sin was made, considered by the Jews as fornication. In that way, stoning, for the break of the seventh commandment killed the girl that had incurred in this sin it. Even due to such punishment, nevertheless, it continued existing cases and more cases of betrayal. Or be for it that he/she sees himself; the subject of the infidelity is already part of the universal culture, thwarting the religious dogma that rejects the betrayal. 

They don't remain doubts that they still exist, in the current days, followers of this doctrine " infidelity ". For instance: it is enough to open a newspaper that with certainty one will be printed more headline there on at least a crime of passion. It is inconceivable that somebody due to such allegation can judge " and to kill somebody in a country where death penalty at least exists for the cases of adultery, and same if it existed, it must be applied the beginning of the contradictory and of the wide defense, what never happened. They killed and ready. And plus, many of these criminals got absolution, alleging the " self-defense of the honor". 

In certain way, with the new Law sanctioned on March 8, 2005, for the current president of Brazil, this allegation it will stop existing, Adultery won't be more considered a crime, as it foresaw the out of step with penal code of 1940. 

Using more than 11 years as source of information the in that I exercised private detective's profession, investigating many cases of infidelity, I remember that a case was just typified as adultery, and even so, it ended up falling through. After some months, there was reconciliation and the parts continued to live that relationship peacefully. 

Theoretically, the difference between betrayal and adultery is insignificant, but even so, it was complicated to get proofs. The betrayal is already less complicated to be proven in the penal procedural ambit, and usually the penalty for a case of infidelity can be summarized to compensation. 

It is of noticing, therefore that the Civil Code treats the infidelity as unacceptable in the relationship: Art. 1.566. They are both spouses' duties: I - reciprocal fidelity; II - life in common, in the home; V - I respect and mutual consideration. It also says in the same Code: Art. 1.723. It is recognized as family entity the stable union between the man and the woman, configured in the coexistence publican, continuous and durable and established with the objective of family constitution. 

In beginning, we are living in a society monogamist, where the family is the base of everything. I verified that the adulterers' good part possesses a life in common, in other words, they divide the same roof, the same car and, sometimes, they still work together. Most of the time they have a public coexistence, where all know about the other, less the unfaithful part, is clear. As says the Brazilian popular saying: “ the betrayed is always the last to know ". Like this being, they would be framed in the article 1.723 of the Civil Code. In thesis, it is a family institution. Is the family the base of everything? Yes, but bigamy stopped being crime in Brazil. Live the polygamy! 

How many people already died for consequence of an infidelity. And worse, I didn't see any in moment any advertising campaign of understanding in mass, invoking the principle of the family, showing that the infidelity hurts the largest property the human being can have, the so glorious family institution. Destroyed families, people being murdered, this is the picture of the collateral effects of the matrimonial infidelity. 

Along the last five years, the number of cases of infidelity had a significant increase. The woman started to betray more. To each 100 cases, 60 are of infidelity, and of these, 28% are of suspicions of feminine infidelity. It is pointed out that the average of current proof is of 32%. Until the year of 1.999, this number represented about 20%, in other words, a significant increase of 12%. 

The detective's paper to the society: in some cases, it is indispensable a professional's help that, in the occupation of your function, it acts in a general way, with the intention of solving suspicion subjects. When the person gets to hire a private detective, it is because such distrusts are little by little destroying the relationship. Cases exist in that anything if it proves, what still can stir up more the distrust. Don't think that hiring a detective will be putting an end to your distrusts, especially because this professional is not any magic one. He works with deductions and with facts, and the professional's resulted many undepend. It is fact that most of the conclusions is not those that the customer waited. 

Divergences exist with relationship to the detective's role. Some say that the detective destroys relationships, others say that he repairs. The truth is that when the customer gets to hire a detective, the relationship doesn't exist anymore, but, just distrusts. 

It is well known that the professional has nothing to do with the customer's decisions. A good professional will never interfere in the decisions of that, because it just fits to the contracted to accomplish the investigation and to present the result. 

Violence. They are rare the cases in that the customer, after receiving the result, thinks about acting with violence, then the need to know to lead the powder-investigation. It is not easy, but in general the customer's behavior reveals if he will act or not with violence. In some cases, it is done necessary a psychological accompaniment. Unlike the one that many think, the woman demonstrates more aggressiveness when you/he/she receives the confirmation of the betrayal, however, few times she acts with violence. On these long years of investigation, it didn't happen any tragic issue, with death, for instance. Be pointed out: a good one talks it always solves a lot of thing, until could save lives. 

The worst diagnosis is when it is verified the suspicions and the unfaithful is practicing the homosexuality. Some customers consider her/it as a double betrayal. There is not the sexual freedom of who wants to discuss that it is, but the noncompliance of the agreement among the related ones. However, which it mustn’t is to confuse freedom with libertinism.


The detective's text and writer Edilmar Lima - General Director of CUFDB - investigations.